Yesterday morning STBEMNH walked out of the house with her overnight bag. She barely said a word beyond 'Bye'.
She had arranged to stay at a friend's as she got a date wrong about me travelling on business. Despite me repeatedly saying I was away and back in the sameday she 'got it wrong' and thought NoozeHoundette would stay at her Grand-Mother's.
STBEMH went to some length and added stress to get a sun-bed and her hair cut this week along with two additional mad-dash to shops to get self-tannig liquid. It does seem like an awful lot of trouble to go to stay at a friends.
A brief word on this 'friend'. She is a serial adulteress, who recently wed her long-time partner after being caught out and feared losing him. When she was cheating she had said was staying with STEBMH as cover.
Now firstly it must be made clear that STEBMH could not be cheating on me as we are not what you could call together. I have made, as detailed elsewhere, requests and approaches. Her only response that I have done too much and we will never be together.
But her behaviour and requests, while it would be unfair to consider them overly friendly, would indicate something of an on-going relationship - requesting expensive early birthday presents? Planning days out together as a family?
Confused.com
The coolness of the depature irked me - I don't know what I expected, but she had not seen our daughter to kiss her good-bye nor see me or her for 36 hours. We're not hugging or anything but a little more, I don't know what, observance that there was a parting.
She had arranged to stay at a friend's as she got a date wrong about me travelling on business. Despite me repeatedly saying I was away and back in the sameday she 'got it wrong' and thought NoozeHoundette would stay at her Grand-Mother's.
STBEMH went to some length and added stress to get a sun-bed and her hair cut this week along with two additional mad-dash to shops to get self-tannig liquid. It does seem like an awful lot of trouble to go to stay at a friends.
A brief word on this 'friend'. She is a serial adulteress, who recently wed her long-time partner after being caught out and feared losing him. When she was cheating she had said was staying with STEBMH as cover.
Now firstly it must be made clear that STEBMH could not be cheating on me as we are not what you could call together. I have made, as detailed elsewhere, requests and approaches. Her only response that I have done too much and we will never be together.
But her behaviour and requests, while it would be unfair to consider them overly friendly, would indicate something of an on-going relationship - requesting expensive early birthday presents? Planning days out together as a family?
Confused.com
The coolness of the depature irked me - I don't know what I expected, but she had not seen our daughter to kiss her good-bye nor see me or her for 36 hours. We're not hugging or anything but a little more, I don't know what, observance that there was a parting.
I was overcome with crippling sadness - or so I thought. I was stricken with a very uncomfortable bug that upset my stomache and gave me a soul-shaking chill. The feelings were very similar to the heart-ache I had experienced previously.
The realization that things really were over. I had completely lost her - it hurt. A lot.
She contacted me by phone and email through the day - only domestic, rational stuff.
All day I was wracked with stomach-lurching pain and shivers, my existence shadowed in melancholy. It sounds dramatic, but what else do you call that feeling of wanting to curl up into a ball and cry?
Devil's Advocate - Things are over. By being civil but withdrawn around the house she is demonstrating the separation. By going away to see her lover without rubbing your nose in it or splashing it all over Facebook she is sparing your feelings.
Or you could be paranoid, making all of this conjecture and normal events into a conspiracy.
NoozeHound, not being one to let it lie, suffering a torrid tummy and excess of moribund reasoned further; STBEMNH was an ealy shift - 07:15 - 16:15. Would she wait at work for her friend to finish sticking around at work? Unlikely that her friend would be working a similar shift, she has different role. Or would the early finish provide enough time to perhaps go further afield? She was checking locations surrepticiously on Google maps, so was clearly going somewhere she had not been before.
Again, so what if she was?
You are not together. She hasn't humiliated you with it, flaunting her tryst before you.
After dinner, I asked NoozeHoundette to phone her Mother and say goodnight. Despite my feelings she had not seen her Mother all day and I just wanted her to touch base with her before bed. The phone was not answered. I gave NoozeHoundette my Blackberry and said send Mummy a nice email.
STBEMNH is never without her phone. The first call was from the house-phone, a witheld number - it would have been obvious it was home as there are no other restricted numbers known to us.
The email was sent but not replied to.
There was a phonecall from her this morning. She called to speak to NoozeHoundette. She said her phone was on silent and she also said she was in the shower when it rang and NoozehOundette rang-off before she could answer it. So was it on silent or did you not get there in time? Or were you ignoring calls from home and my phone - becauase...? What...? Didn't really fit the mood? Didn't want to hear from me while with him? Irrespective, she should have phoned the NoozeHoundette. As I said she had not seen her that morning and a call to say 'goodnight' would have been the decent thing to do.
She didn't ask to speak to me, not even 'does Daddy want to speak with me?' to make sure everything was alright with the NoozeHoundette, as any Mother would do.
Perhaps she was avoiding me? Guiltiness? Awkwardness? There was no obvious acrominy between us.
I text her this morning to remind her to take NoozeHoundette to Brownies. No response.
This was all written during Thursday day time; far too long for a FML, more like a...
The realization that things really were over. I had completely lost her - it hurt. A lot.
She contacted me by phone and email through the day - only domestic, rational stuff.
All day I was wracked with stomach-lurching pain and shivers, my existence shadowed in melancholy. It sounds dramatic, but what else do you call that feeling of wanting to curl up into a ball and cry?
Devil's Advocate - Things are over. By being civil but withdrawn around the house she is demonstrating the separation. By going away to see her lover without rubbing your nose in it or splashing it all over Facebook she is sparing your feelings.
Or you could be paranoid, making all of this conjecture and normal events into a conspiracy.
NoozeHound, not being one to let it lie, suffering a torrid tummy and excess of moribund reasoned further; STBEMNH was an ealy shift - 07:15 - 16:15. Would she wait at work for her friend to finish sticking around at work? Unlikely that her friend would be working a similar shift, she has different role. Or would the early finish provide enough time to perhaps go further afield? She was checking locations surrepticiously on Google maps, so was clearly going somewhere she had not been before.
Again, so what if she was?
You are not together. She hasn't humiliated you with it, flaunting her tryst before you.
After dinner, I asked NoozeHoundette to phone her Mother and say goodnight. Despite my feelings she had not seen her Mother all day and I just wanted her to touch base with her before bed. The phone was not answered. I gave NoozeHoundette my Blackberry and said send Mummy a nice email.
STBEMNH is never without her phone. The first call was from the house-phone, a witheld number - it would have been obvious it was home as there are no other restricted numbers known to us.
The email was sent but not replied to.
There was a phonecall from her this morning. She called to speak to NoozeHoundette. She said her phone was on silent and she also said she was in the shower when it rang and NoozehOundette rang-off before she could answer it. So was it on silent or did you not get there in time? Or were you ignoring calls from home and my phone - becauase...? What...? Didn't really fit the mood? Didn't want to hear from me while with him? Irrespective, she should have phoned the NoozeHoundette. As I said she had not seen her that morning and a call to say 'goodnight' would have been the decent thing to do.
She didn't ask to speak to me, not even 'does Daddy want to speak with me?' to make sure everything was alright with the NoozeHoundette, as any Mother would do.
Perhaps she was avoiding me? Guiltiness? Awkwardness? There was no obvious acrominy between us.
I text her this morning to remind her to take NoozeHoundette to Brownies. No response.
This was all written during Thursday day time; far too long for a FML, more like a...
...welcome to the disappointment.
0 comments:
Post a Comment
We can't both be right, it's probably me.
What say you esteemed visitor?